You Can Never Go Home

“Things change. And friends leave. Life doesn’t stop for anybody.” ~Stephen Chbosky, The Perks of Being A Wallflower

My professor gave us an example. She made us remember what it was like, to leave hometowns to study for college. Then, when we come back, it’s a whole different story. There are new stores all around, new buildings, even new faces. And maybe, if you notice that nothing has changed, then maybe it’s you that have changed.

It’s the concept of change that made me shift in my chair uncomfortably during class.

It’s one of those things I can’t admit to myself. That I’ve changed. I don’t even know for sure if that’s true, because I am always with me, and I don’t notice. It’s like realizing your hair grew long. It’s there, but you don’t notice. Only those that see you once in a while notice the changes.

It’s also hard to realize that your surroundings change. People change habits, relationships come and go, new people appear and the people you’re used to suddenly disappear. New rampant grocery stores occupy your childhood playground, and the silent streets you’ve known are no longer silent. It’s home, yes, but not quite the same. It’s like realizing that your mom has just cleaned your room. It’s quite uncomfortable.

Change isn’t necessarily a bad thing, but it sure is uncertain. Maybe it will be good, but there’s no assurance. We do have a choice of living only in the present, but soon that present will be the past, soon forgotten.

But yes, you can never really go home. It’s a sad concept. It’s kind of a way of saying that you have to move on because if you don’t, you get left behind.

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